What's in a name?

Lady in Car: What are you gonna name it?
Alison Bradbury: What?
Lady in Car: The baby.
Alison Bradbury: [realizing she's faking being pregnant] Oh, the baby. Well, if it's a girl, Cynthia, and if it's a boy, Elliot.
Lady in Car: Those are lovely names.
Walter (Gib) Gibson: Elliot? You're gonna name the kid Elliot? No, you can't name the kid Elliot. Elliot is a fat kid with glasses who eats paste. You're not gonna name the kid Elliot. You gotta give him a real name. Give him a name. Like Nick.
Alison Bradbury: Nick?
Walter (Gib) Gibson: Yeah, Nick. Nick's a real name. Nick's your buddy. Nick's the kind of guy you can trust, the kind of guy you can drink a beer with, the kind of guy who doesn't mind if you puke in his car, Nick!
[Alison looks disgusted]
Walter (Gib) Gibson: [to Lady in Car] Oh, vomit. I'm sorry. Vomit.

What IS in a name? These days I am really not sure. The names people give their children fucking amaze me. Very few people in America are going with traditional American names (the one's borrowed from our days on THE continent). Names such as John, Fred, Joseph, James, Mary, Anne, Sarah, etc. You know...the judeo-christian-anglo shit that we have been naming our children for centuries. For many generations the only names we thought were odd were immigrant names like Giuseppi, Pierre, Antonia, Lucia, and Jesus....NO...Hay-zeus....not Jesus...and who the fuck can get away with naming their kid Jesus? The latinos can. Why? Who knows...it is an enigma of sorts. Black American's were the first to seperate themselves from traditional anglo names. I guess I understand the fact that they no longer wanted to name their children the names that former slave owners bestowed upon their families for generations. Names such as Hank, Tom, John Henry, and Harriet have all but disappeared. The names of African-Americans in American literature are gone. Today the names are mind-boggling. Names like D'Anderique, Rajerion, Deontae, Germicia, Sequinthia, Lemunia, Sharquincia, Quinflukia, and Shontae are enough to leave not only white people, but ALL people speachless. And white people are naming their children more and more after the bullshit that they see in the movies. I believe it all started in the early 1970's. The fucking hippies began this shit by naming their kids Star, Moon, and Rainbow. Suburban middle-class white folks also wanted to seperate themselves from all the masses by getting creative with names that they saw on television. Hollywood writers got bored with always naming their characters Jim and Maryanne so they started naming them Shawna and Jennifer and Jason. Today these names make up half of the people I know. I bet I know 37 Jennifers and 190 Jasons. Today the trend is continuing. Half of the white kids in this country under the age of 15 are named after the characters on that cheerful little show we all love called "Friends". Personally I hated that fucking show so those names irritate me even more. I refuse to even repeat the names because I will be an outcast in society for offending all of my friends who named their kids those names. I will be an untouchable or undesirable as people in India call their misfits. And the same rings true for black America...How many kids in 10 years will be named Shaquille, LaBron, and Barak? Well, I am not really sure, but I would bet the house that it is going to be monumental. As for me, if I ever have kids they will be named old family names. Rather than name my son Sue (which I would rather do...but won't), I will probably go with Hubert Franklin. Yeah..yeah...go ahead and laugh. He will get his ass kicked a few times but it will make him tougher. It was my grandfather's and uncle's name and they are dead. I will call him Hugh.